Expat Advice: Relationships in Santo Domingo , Dominican Rep

What is the name of the city or town that you are reporting on?

Santo Domingo

What is your current status? Are you single, dating, in a long-term relationship, married or divorced?

I am single currently but have dated here in the DR for almost 11 years! I was in a relationship with a local man for 3 years.

What is it like in your country of residence for someone with your relationship status (married/divorced/dating)? If you're single, how do you meet other people? Do English-speaking people tend to gravitate to certain parts of your city?

As a foreigner we are viewed in different ways depending where you are and how you behave. In the beginning you will be seen as a walking ATM machine if you live in tourism areas. If you can afford to visit or live here, then you are seen as rich. You have the ability to make someone's life easier. The first item of business - DO NOT TRUST ANYONE. TRUST MUST BE EARNED HERE. Early on the only people you will get to know are those used to hanging around tourists. It takes time to get to know the culture and good people here. IF you come here to work, then you will immediately get to know others at your workplace. Learn from them. Words of caution - if you met him or her at the hotel when you were on vacation then you need to be extra careful. Do some research on the term "sankie" and take it seriously. Hotel and tourism workers are well known for taking advantage of naive and trusting tourists!! And this can lead to a lot of financial and emotional trauma. Dating here needs to be done with caution. Don't behave here differently then you would where you are from. Do not pay for everything if you are a woman. Be careful what you pay for if you are the man. IF you enter into a relationship with a local person, you often are seen as taking on the entire family. You need to set clear boundaries on this early on. Do not start paying for everything or it will never end. And be aware that you are expected to increase the standard of living of everyone!!!! Be careful. Dating and relationships tend to move fast here as well. I've seen them move from dating to living together in under 2 weeks. Yikes. Imagine not speaking the language, not understanding the culture and having huge educational and financial differences..... take it SLOW...... If it was meant to be - it can wait a few more weeks. Being single and meeting people is not hard. Understanding if the other party is single can be difficult. I've been lied to often on this one. My advice is never to date a married man, or a man in a relationship with another woman whether married or not. It is not worth the repercussions. Here culturally men are almost expected to have more then one woman. That is going to be a tough one to handle if you are not okay with this.

If you do not have children, do you generally spend your social time with other expat couples? If not, what else do you like to do as a couple?

I mix with both expats and locals. I have no children so my friends tend not to be people with children. Socially I do networking events, go dancing, go to concerts, museums, restaurants and frankly I meet people everywhere....

If you are married or in a relationship with a person of another nationality, how has this experience enriched you as a person. What kind of challenges do you face?

The biggest challenges to being in a relationship with someone from another culture are those historical cultural differences. Without the history and understanding we often misinterpret things. It makes it tough to get through but it can be worth it!!!! It is a lifelong learning opportunity!!!!

What would be the best advice you could give someone with your relationship status that lives in your country of residence? Any other thoughts?

Oh my, the best advice I can give is to be open, open to learning, open to differences.... keep your boundaries while respecting the culture! And the biggest item - DO NOT TRUST immediately. TRUST MUST BE EARNED!!!