Je suis amoureux. I'm in love. I met a wonderful Moroccan woman online several months ago. We have been talking through emails, facebook, video chat and phonecalls every day the entire time. I have no reason to doubt her intentions. She is not looking to marry me for a U.S. green card. If you had knowledge of our entire correspondence history this would be fairly obvious to you also. She is genuine, sweet, simple, and has the same family and relationship goals as I. I have a good job here in the U.S. and plan to be the money maker in the relationship. She wants to be a housewife, stay home, take care of the home and children while I'm working. It is the simple traditional marriage I've always dreamed of and I will treat her very well and with the upmost respect for it.
Ok. So I'm on this site, because I do not live in morocco. I have many questions, which might be better answered by English speakers. She does not speak English, but she is starting to learn. I even purchased English/Arabic language books and sent them to her as an aid. I also sent a few gifts for her and her mother (her mother is divorced and they live together). She speaks Arabic and French and beginner English. I speak French also, but not fluently.
The marriage process.... She wants to get married in Morocco instead of flying to the U.S. with a fiancé visa. I agree. I'd rather get married there too! The weddings there look amazing, beautiful and much more interesting than weddings here in the US. It would also allow her family to be present for the once in a lifetime event. I want this for her. She deserves it.
I already know about the nightmare process it is going to be. From what I've heard it is going to take me 3 weeks or slightly longer to get all of the paperwork finished and in front of the local city judge (where she lives) to get the marriage license.
Question #1.
Would it be better to convert to Islam in Morocco or would it be smarter to do this in the USA to save time? Will a conversion certificate from a U.S. Muslim center be accepted?
Question #2. When I fly to Morocco and meet her and her mother, what would be the most respectful way to greet them? I'm assuming I should greet her mother first out of respect, am I right? Is this done with the handshake and hand to heart?
Question #3. I'm still a little confused on the timeline of events for the marriage process. So far my understanding is.... Get engaged (with engagement ring and propose to her for marriage). Then do the nasty paperwork process (3+ weeks). Once the judge issues a marriage certificate the wedding date can be set and carried out. I know I must offer money and gifts to my fiancé for the marriage (dowry). I was told this is done just before the marriage ceremony. Is this true? When exactly? How much (in dirhams)? I want to give her as much as I possibly can, but I'd also like to know what the lower boundary is. I wouldn't want to make an offer that is insulting. I don't know what the norms are there. The reason I want to offer more than normal is because the dowry has a purpose. It is a form of insurance so to speak, for the wife.
Question #4. How much do weddings typically cost (in dirhams)? We are going to do a 1 night ceremony. 1 soiree. But I want it to be beautiful and traditional (so does she). Music, food, henna, dress and so on. Any ideas? I'm being told the cost is between 50,000-80,000 dirhams. I want to confirm if this sounds typical.
Question #5. I have absolutely no idea about the chronology of the wedding day events. When do I lift her veil? When do we sign the marriage certificate? When do we exchange rings? What order? Any acts I'm missing here?
Question #6. I know it is the custom to offer pastries and other items to your host when you are invited into their home. She and her mother will be meeting me at the airport. How will I provide these items to show respect if I don't have the chance to get them before meeting up?
Question #7. While we are engaged, what are some do's and don'ts while out in public? I already know we can't hold hands, hug, or kiss. Anything I'm missing? I already know sex is off the table until married and it doesn't bother me one bit. I'm not marrying her for that. She is an amazing woman and much more than just a sexual partner. If that was all I was interested in it would be easily found here in the US.
Question #8
Does anyone know anything about the K-3 visa process? Will she be able to come back to the U.S. with me directly after our marriage while the K-3 is processing? Or will she be in Morocco waiting for a year and a half before we can be together again in the U.S.? (this would be horrible)... If worst comes to worst I will hire an immigration lawyer to assist.
Thank you for taking the time to read this. Any and all mature comments are appreciated.
Morocco
Living in Morocco Guide
Morocco Forum
Contribute
Best Places to Live in Morocco
Healthcare in Morocco
Moving to Morocco Guide
Pros & Cons of Living in Morocco
10 Tips for Living in Morocco