Hello everyone. I know this subject has been posted sooo many times before, but however, I see that my situation is a little bit different than the others, so I am going to give it a shot anyway. And if I am lucky, maybe someone will have the perfect answer!
I am a 20 year old norwegian girl, who is "married" to a 24 year old Egyptian man. I went to Egypt (Sharm El Sheikh) for vacation one week in May. And yes, i met someone. He owns the perfume shop in the hotel i stayed in. And please note, OWNS, doesnt just work there.
Nothing happened between us until the last night, we flirted all week and then the last night we kissed and was very happy together, and everything was very perfect.
When i came back to Norway, I missed him so much, and we kept in touch trough the phone. But I always called him, he just sent me a few messages. Anyway he said he was in love with me, and wanted to marry me etc.
THEN, one day, he stopped keeping in touch with me, and we didnt talk for weeks, before I sent him a message and said that I couldn stop thinking about him. And he answered me and said me too. He said that he had stopped keeping in touch because I really didnt have a religion, and he couldnt be with someone unreligious.
I said to him, no problem,let me come, and well see how it goes. I told him I am a christian, which is sort of true, as I am baptised, I just dont practice that much.
But I didnt just go back for a vacation. I quitted my lease for my apartment, quitted my job, cause I didnt want anything to hold me back in Norway if i wanted to stay in Egypt for more than two weeks.
So in July, i saied goodbye to my family and friends and i went back alone. Seeing him again was the happiest moment of my life, he came to get me in the airport, and took me to my hotel.
The first night we kissed in the car, had dinner, and he asked me to marry him. The first night. I said yes, cause it felt so right, and I loved him so much allready, I know it sounds crazy, but i really felt like I knew him as we had spoken every day for two months before i came back.
The next day, we went looking for a lawyer, and with a couple of his friends as witnesses, we signed the marriage contract. Of course, this is not a fully legal marriage in front of the governement, just so we could be together.
We rented an apartment together for three days after this. And after a few days we went to see his family outside Cairo. They were so loving and souch good people, really made me feel welcome. But he didnt want to tell them we were allready married, cause he wanted to see that his family was okey with me first.
Later that night he said they loved me, and that everything was so okey and he was so relieved that every thing went well.
We went back to Sharm agian after two days. We had dinner togetherevery day after he finished work, and we were so happy together, and he was so loving, and I loved him more every day. I saw him from like 10 at night until 2-3 at night every night.
We started to fix the papers, to go to Cairo to finish our marriage, my whole family was planning to come in January next year to celebrate our marriage and meet his family.
After the two weeks, I decided to not go back to Norway, so he rented me and he paid for a room at the "shabby" hotel he lives in in Sharm. Only men who work in Sharm live there. We had to have seperate rooms cause we were not legally married.
I got sick, he took me to the hospital, he paid all my expences, he treated me to restaurant dinners every day, took me to romantic places, took me to Cairo several times to see his family when his mother was in the hospital.
I was very happy there for one month, but then, I started to miss my friends, my family, and got cold feet about the marriage, and "for ever", as he always said to me.
I decided to go back to Norway to get a little bit of distance, and see if mine and his feeling were really true. So, I went back. And at first it was going to be for two weeks, but it got longer and longer. I left in first of August, and I am still here. And everyday my uncertainty about this marriage gets bigger.
He is a wonderful man, and has all the qualities I look for. He owns two shops, one perfume and one papyrus. He has money. He is about the only one of his friends that has a car. He used to rent a room in that shabby hotel, but he now rents an apartment, cause he wanted us to have bigger space. In the good seasons he told me he makes about 20-30.000 EGP. He always has money, and gives a lot for his family. He paid for his sisters wedding, his brothers education, some of his parents new house.
He is one of the "richer" in Sharm, and everyone in his family works. They just built a new, big house, and have a big property in their village. His sister and her husband own a big apartment in an other village.
Im sorry, this is to long, but i need to explain the background for my questions.
I have no values here in Norway, I only have a credit card bill of 20.000 EGP, which he has offered to pay for me. And he says I can work if I want to (in Egypt) so that I dont feel bored while hes working all day. Im just thinking, he cannot want money from me, cause i dont have it???
He is wonderful in every way. So kind to everyone, and so helpful. And he always gets credit for that, cause he always helps people, he gets so much back. He works so hard, and really think about our future together, how we can have a good life, wants to have an own savings account for me so I can visit my family often.
Here are the downsides: He works from 8 in the morning until 11-12 in the evening, so we dont really have much time together.
Also I was sick alot the last time in Egypt, and if I live there for a longer time, I loose my right to my health support from the norwegian government. I tried to talk to him about this, but you know what they say; InshaAllah. If gods willing. If i tell him to wear a seatbealt he says it, and if I say we need health insurance, he says it. I am worried that he doesnt really understand my good life here, and the support you get if you get sick, have children etc.
Anyway, everything seems okey, so what can he possible want from me??? Everyone in here says that Egyptian men all want something from u. But he has more than me when it comes to values.
Also he has said that its good to live in Egypt, and that he likes it, but he says that he wants our children to be raised in Norway, cause its better for them there.
But why would he want to live here? He has university education, but even in Norway, if you dont speak fluent norwegian and have 5 years education etc etc. its difficult to find a good job.
I am only 20 years old, i have almost no life experience, and I need help to make my decision!
PS: we allready broke up like three times, first him, cause I stayed here so long, and he begged me to come back to see him, and missed me so much. And then me, cause I was sure i didnt want to come back. And then him again, cause I said I didnt want to come back (he said it was okey and then changed his mind again).
And one more thing, he sent me money for a ticket back and for me to spend while I was here, like 3000 EGP. (just to say its definetly not about money here, that he is poor.)
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