With time and experience, we learn that there is a right way and a wrong way to do things.
The Right way brings rewards, eliminates stress and overall, produces a happier outcome. The Wrong way invites frustration, expense and a generally leaves a bad taste in our mouths from the experience.
This model can be illustrated perfectly in the search by Western men for wives in Ukraine. There is a right way and a wrong way to do it. The wrong way is to believe what the online marriage agencies tell you about the perfect way to find a wife using their services. You are asked to create a profile on their website, and pay a large sum of money for a membership or the right to correspond with their female clients using their very expensive messaging service. No exchange of personal contact information is allowed. You are also encouraged to 'be a man' and buy a lady expensive gifts and bouquets of flowers ( all which cost many times more than if you bought them yourself on the street). After spending a few thousand dollars (Euros), you finally meet 'the one', or you just decide to travel to Ukraine to meet these beautiful women.
In my example I will use Odessa as the meeting venue because that is where I live and have first-hand experience. Upon arrival, you contact your date and arrange a first meeting. She, of course, claims that she doesn't speak English and must have an interpreter present (the truth is that most women here under the age of 30 know enough English to have a conversation). But, not just any interpreter will do...she must have a marriage agency interpreter which charges $20 per hour. Even if she is fluent in English, she will play dumb and insist on having an interpreter, because she makes a percentage of what you pay after the date. Upon arrival with her interpreter in tow, she will 'suggest' that you take her to a specific restaurant (her 'favorite'). Being a gentleman, of course you agree. She takes you to a restaurant where they have a 'special' menu for foreigners with prices 2-3 times higher than what the locals pay. After she and her interpreter order every expensive thing on the menu and you have a pleasant conversation, you pay the bill and the girls will excuse themselves to go to the 'powder room'. There, they will receive a 20% kickback from the restaurant manager. Now the time is late and your beauty must go home. Of course, she will ask you to give her some money for a taxi. Even if she lives a 5 minute walk away, she and her interpreter must have a taxi. In Odessa, you can go anywhere in the city by taxi for less than $4. But, she will ask you for anywhere from $10 to $50 for cab fare. So, after this wonderful evening, you are anywhere from $100 to $500 poorer and enchanted, besotted, and enamored with this beautiful lady and willing to do it all again. Thus, the corrupt marriage agencies know their profits are assured.
I am ashamed to admit, my friends, that this is the model I followed until I figured out the big scam. But now I will tell you about the 'right' way to meet a woman in Odessa. And again, I will use my own experience.
Last Thursday I bought a 1 month 'Gold' membership on UkraineDate.com. This website is run by some relatively 'straight up' guys in Great Britain. For $25 I gained full access to all the ladies on the site. This site is not involved with any kind of marriage agency and the women here are much more likely to be sincere (no opportunity to make a profit). From reading their profiles, you can also see the REAL age gap that these women are willing to accept. I entered my search criteria and sent messages (for free) to a couple of likely prospects. One responded and agreed to meet me on Monday night (after the initial contact, you are free to exchange phone numbers or contact each other on Skype, Viber, Facebook, VK, or any other FREE communication medium). Her English was a little 'iffy', so I told her that I would bring one of my friends to be an interpreter. 'No problem', she said.
At the appointed time, I met her with my interpreter. I did not bring her any flowers, because I have learned that most women do not like flowers on a first date (too ostentatious), and you would be surprised at how many women really don't like cut flowers. I did bring her a small box of assorted chocolates. I suggested that we go to a nearby cafe to talk. “Not so fast, Bucko”, she said. (She didn't really say those words, but, you get the idea). She said she wanted to make sure that I was serious about a relationship, because she didn't want to waste her time on a guy that just wanted to play games. I smiled inside and said to myself, “This kind of honesty is refreshing!” After standing on the street for 30 minutes and answering her polite, but serious questions, she decided that I was sincere enough and said, “Let's go to a cafe.” We sat in the cafe for another 1 ½ hours and had a really nice conversation. She and the interpreter ordered only coffee, and I had a fruit smoothie. After the meeting we parted with smiles and hugs and agreed to meet again soon.
The total cost for this date was $8 ($4 for the chocolates, and $4 for the coffee, etc). When I tried to give money to my friend for her work as an interpreter, she refused because she said she was my friend and would not take any money for helping me.
Now, my friends, I don't suggest that in order to meet an honest woman, you have to live in Odessa for two years, learn enough Russian to survive, and develop a broad social network of local people like I have done. I am just pointing out that you should do your research and use your big brain instead of your little one to make yourselves aware of the options available to you, and the challenges you will face. There are women here that are outstandingly beautiful, both inside and outside, but it will not be easy to find them.
I wish you all success and 'Good Hunting!'
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